Weekly 4

-------------------------The athens Bimonthly Fortdaily---------------------


Soccer sensations:
Manchester united was being bought over by a bunch of fat lards of americans. This caused waves of pale and pasty british fans to chug immense amounts of cold milk and throw up on mirrors or other highly reflective surfaces. This massive change had ripples reaching far shores where India's favorite 'Second place is all we can dream of" PPUFC had members in a fit of rage and mostly confusion doing a very poor rendition of 'the las Ketchup' song in pink ballet uniforms, white tights with grey charlie chaplin shoes. The previous sentence was entered in the competition for the world's longest sentence at the guinness book of world records but was put to shame by a little longer , equally useless and much lamer sentence written up and EMAILED in by Dhruv'I have given up using the computer' Tandan.


"Dude where's my Naidu" Hyderabad
With our only on location reporter taking a vacation after a severe bout of hay fever and genital warts, we are going to make up the news as we go along. Joy "U quiz me I kill you" Rao had an unexpected win at the tournament, beating ace champ Satyaki"I was on Bournvita quiz in 8th grade"Prasad and decided to rub it in by shoving his trophy up Mr. Prasad's ass.Vasu"CBIT"Dev was last seen crying when his lovable seniors had left college and reminisced those good ragging days. Ken lobo was hit by a drunk cycle rider at 4am when he was sleep walking and decided to water the plants under marredpally flyover without a hose.On a reminiscing note we should remember the very resourceful Dhruv"Schlong" Tandan who when was just a little five year old BOY , always managed to find something to "play" with even though he wasn't around any toys.

Athens"No olympics EVER here, Dumbass" Ohio
The Bandaru brother whose makes up the other half of the combined bandaru brothers weight is trying to stay grounded after the much deserved praise from Joy"deep"Rao on his Hi5 picture which has no productive value of any kind. Rahul was first utterly confused when asked to talk about david copperfield on the phone with the Tandman(with a conflicting "no dont tell that bastard" in the background) , which he had only read when he was as short as Joy in 9th grade. But after a quick email from his brother and others at the same time and a quick viewing of the game, He , like his intelligent counterparts in hyderabad figured it out on the first watch. With a humane touch all he has a little tip for dhruv - "Poker is not a guess game, you have to count all the cards to win everytime".He was last seen eyeing an icecream cone in a kid's hand.

Entertainment News:
The Popular and always in the news band AIR - sucks.

*This paper was short on sweet since the editor shot himself watching reality tv and the assistant ed. had a small break between classes where he was bored. More people will be highlighted in the next issue, depending on funding *ahem*.

Copyright this * Biatch.